Kalin Art & Spirit

Partnerships & Friendships

So the Universe is giving me a message loud and clear this morning.
You are on your own, girl. Show me whatcha got!”

Lesson: There is nobody else that is on the path I walk. People who I thought were my partners, spouse and friends all have their own agendas. The things I feel are most important pale in comparison to their own goals- even when I believed we were working toward the same things.
Universe says, “If there’s something you know you must do; get started. Do it. Pursue it. Follow your heart and keep listening to your Spirit to guide you.”

I am a person who wants to blend and merge with others…Enneagram subtype is called 1:1, aka the Lover. I am a lover of people. I want to become partners with others in order to support each other and get more accomplished than one can do alone. Ive experienced the joy of synchronicity and friendship in the past. It blisses me out more than words can express. And yet,
I know I can’t depend on other people to make me happy….even when helping other people is what I am here on Earth to do. It’s quite a conundrum. :/ *sigh*

This loving kindness that spills from my soul, Ive found lately, drives some people away.
A friend said to me, ” You Love too much. You need to be less enthusiastic in your loving.”
I shake my head – feeling a bit discouraged.
Im only following what a great teacher is said to have told his followers, “Love one another”-
Kahlil Gibhran says, “Love one another, but make not a bond of love- the cypress and the oak grow not in each other’s shadow”
I get this.
What I dont understand is why people, who say they are committed to me via marriage or friendship, stand on the sidelines cheering for me – but wont ‘go long’ to catch the football I pass them.

Reciprocation. Is it too much to ask?
When Ive asked for help, no one shows up.
So Ive taken this mantra,~
It looks like nobody loves me, it’s okay, I love myself. I think Im pretty damned great!
Actually, I KNOW Im pretty damned great…and wonder why others dont want a piece of that.
I would gladly share anything I am, have or know.

My goals are pretty clear to me. So today I take my first steps solo.
My dream is that others will notice Ive begun, and possibly, follow-
come up behind me, and ask to join me. The answer, of course,would be YES.
It’s not that I NEED them to succeed in fulfilling my goals…its just that the journey would be made that much sweeter if they were along for the ride. <3
It’s a long, winding road ahead of those of us who walk our paths alone.
I wish us all Courage and the Best of Luck!

“Everyone walks alone – but along the way, we secretly hope to find the oasis of friendship, to feed us and quench our thirst.” – GenieDjinn

February 6, 2012 original post

Posted August 19th, 2012.

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Meaningful Work

Meaningful work in the Age of Aquarius. Today the Sun is in the sign of Aquarius and Neptune goes retrograde for the next 14 years.
Its a momentous moment. Hhmm, a bit of redundancy there?

Neptune is one of the outer planets, and influences things like psychic ability, dreams, illusions/delusions, water and oil on a generational level. As it goes retrograde, (seen on Earth as an apparent backwards movement in the skies), it becomes time for us as humanity to review and plan for new ways to implement solutions that serve the greater good! We need to especially find ways to stop using oil and protect our water before it is too late.

The Harvard Business Review recently ran an article that gave advice to people in college as to how to go about gaining personal happiness and financial reward…something we’d all like to know a little more about in these times. I’d add that the most rewarding of ways to live ones life is to have it based on a strong ethical background. Think of the uber-wealthy who give much of their energy, time and money to charitable causes, and you will understand what I mean.
The major points the HBR suggested were;

*Travel. Nice, if you can afford it…travel in a way that you can connect to the local people and discover insights to local ways of life.

*Develop situational awareness. Find something that needs to be fixed or solved in the place where you are.
*Look into problems that affect you in a very personal way. Use your individual Passions for a Purpose greater than yourself.
*Connect with people working on big problems. Use the internet and personal connections to network; discover more than you might have wondered about, and use this information in positive ways to both expand your area of expertise – as well as experience. This makes you more valuable a commodity as a thinking worker and allows for greater level of opportunity to come your way!

*Happiness comes from the intersection of what you love,
what you’re good at, and what the world needs. This is the big sticker. Maybe you know yourself well enough to realize your strengths and avoid your weaknesses…maybe you know you want to be of service, but don’t know how to get there…then there’s the sticking point;
What is it that serves to excite you, interest you- what are the causes that are greater than yourself that you feel called to and are worthy enough for you to dedicate your life and time to serving?
Discover this and you’re on your way!

Some of these ‘big ticket items’ are Global warming, Financial equity, Sexual Equality, Human Rights- large areas of concern that may either need to be stopped, healed or repaired individually and globally. These don’t necessarily need to be in the area of your expertise, in fact, many people feel more rewarded by finding a passion that has always been ‘with them’ but they put aside, thinking there was ‘no money’ in it…..and took a different career path. Now is the time to change course!

Pluto is in Capricorn, and will be for another 20 years or so, which means that the old ways of doing things~ and old, patriarchal traditions in society are crumbling in order to make way for the new – which will serve everyone.

Everyone can help: in our own ways, in our own circles, in our own worlds.

This is the Age of Aquarius; WE ARE the generations of today and tomorrow, that will serve humanity and even out the playing field between rich and poor, the haves and the have nots, in unique and electrifying ways! Welcome to the 21st century and the New Age~

Be a carrier of Love and Light and Serve Others.
Its the most direct path toward happiness and success that there is!

originally posted February 4, 2012

Posted August 19th, 2012.

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Words of Wisdom

The following is on a plaque Im gifting to one of my women’s circle friends tomorrow at our gift exchange party. It’s a ‘pirate party’, so I might end up with my own gift at the end of the day~
I love these ladies, they’re my *aunties* of choice. Naughty and nice, full of wisdom and life experience~ a blessing to know, each and every one.

~Words of Wisdom~
Life is what you make it!
Live with Intention! Do what you love! Celebrate diversity! Keep learning!
Play with abandon! Tell silly jokes! Keep confidences! Listen carefully!
Always say please and thank you! Be generous! Seek wisdom!
Go out of your way for someone you barely know!
Stand up for the little guy! Keep your mind open!
Tell your friends you appreciate them! Share your passions!
Read to a child! Throw your head back and sing!
Never, ever give up!  -anon

Namaste and Happiest of Holidays~ Genie

originally posted December 8, 2011

Posted August 19th, 2012.

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Feminism is for Everyone

There is a great movement underway in the world today which I’m glad to report; Earth Based Religions are the fastest growing religion today!
Earth Based practices honor the balance of female and male energy and teach the importance of POWER WITH and POWER WITHIN rather than POWER OVER.

These practices awaken all people, not just women, to their heart energy so we can act with compassion for all beings. They also awaken the sexual energy of the solar plexus so that regenerative power is used with wisdom for creation and healing.
And most importantly, when this powerful Female creative/destructive energy is allowed to be used with discernment and discretion rather than with shame, compulsion or in the hopes to manipulate others, we will see vast improvements on the lives of the masses.
This goes just opposite with the advertising industries’ using sex to sell everything!

Everyone subconsciously knows the ‘power’ of young women.
The story of Snow White is a metaphorical tale of a mother who is jealous of the daughter who will soon replace her as the most powerful being in the castle. In this story, the Queen tries to kill her step-daughter to preserve her own status a bit longer, and is rightly undone because she’s a traitor to her own sex.

But it was the Native American Elder women that had the say of whether a battle was necessary- and warriors only fought with their blessings. Long ago Crones were revered for their wisdom and life experience. Today’s culture of youth and virility is aimed at the young male and achievement, not the slower wisdom of the grandmother or the powerful energies of women.
We have to find this female/male balance before we destroy ourselves!

The Hindus are aware of this last type of energy and it is best depicted by the Goddess Kali.
She is a blue-skinned holy terror about whose neck hangs warriors skulls dripping with blood. About her waist is a skirt made of arms. Her blood-red tongue sticks out and her eyes are wild with ecstacy as she tramples and breaks down barriers that keep us from fulfilling our greatest potential. She is the great goddess of destruction AND creation. She works on an eternal quest of perfecting the world.
Kali shows us that woman’s power is Explosive, Transformative, and Dangerous if mishandled.
Oh yes, it is! You don’t want to piss off Kali or you’ll be dust before you knew what hit you! ; )
But handled correctly, Kali’s energies bring enlightenment, self-awareness and self-actualization.

A modern version of Kali is the Reclaiming Tradition, which was started by Starhawk in the 1960’s in San Fransisco. In short, it offers all people the chance to reclaim their own feminine energy and become powerful. This tradition invites social activists who instigate change from their incredible heart, solar and sacral energies, to affect change in the world for all people. 
They know that when the weakest link is supported, the people thrive. 
Reclamation of female power can~ and should be for everybody!

May you find your powerful core~
and be transformed by the female energies of the Great Goddess!
Bright Blessings.   ~Namaste’

PS I am Laughing Out Loud at the great consternation of right wing politicos about the ‘problem’ of the Japanese Emperor being ‘ruined’ by his supposed ‘sleeping with the Goddess Amateratsu! They just dont get it! Would that our senators would try to sleep with the Statue of Liberty!

original post date September 4, 2011

Posted August 19th, 2012.

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a Reason, A Season or a Lifetime

Relationships are what God gives us in order to see ourselves,
define who we are, and learn to grow more Godlike.

Today Im a bit down, realizing that a new friendship Ive made will soon
be changing due to their moving. When Ive invested time, and thought,
hopes and love into growing our friendship and keeping it alive,
by making sure we contacted each other on a regular basis and kept
lines of communication flowing as best I could.
They fed me when I needed feeding
and made me see the world more brightly,
if for only a season.
Our time together seems all too short
and the cost to my heart so dear.
I know how it is to move away;
everything is new and exciting,
people adapt to their environment,
and promises to stay in touch are broken,
~not out of spite, but out of necessity.
I have to learn to take this poem to heart….
~but its not easy!

Reason, Season, or Lifetime
When someone is in your life for a REASON,
it is usually to meet a need you have expressed.
They have come to assist you through a difficulty;
to provide you with guidance and support;
to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually.
They may seem like a godsend, and they are.
They are there for the reason you need them to be.

Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time,
this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.
Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away.
Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.
What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done.
The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON,
because your turn has come to share, grow or learn.
They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.
They may teach you something you have never done.

They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.
Believe it. It is real. But only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons;
things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation.
Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person,
and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life
It is said that love is blind ~ but friendship is clairvoyant.

— Unknown

For all my friends of all stripes, shades and hues.
I love you, dearly.
Your lessons make me who I am and who I will be.
You will always live in my heart~
so please, plan to come by and visit!

originally posted August 18, 2011

Posted August 19th, 2012.

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A Friend

A Friend is someone we like and want to share with,
someone who believes in us and holds us accountable to be our best selves,
someone who lets us know we matter to them,
someone who enriches us, makes us joyful
and lets us know we are not alone.
2011@all rights reserved

Posted August 19th, 2012.

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Aquarian Full Moon

The full moon in Aquarius occurs about now, 10:00 Mountain time, 13 August 2012.
It overpowered seeing too many Perseid meteorites last night…maybe next year the light of the moon will be less intense and share the night sky~
The Aquarius energy that abounds today is all about groups, teams and the brotherly love of humanity, the impulse to fight for what’s fair, social justice and human rights. Aquarius rules sci-fi,  quirkiness, idealized worlds and the right to radical individualism, objectivism,  reason, and the mind’s true liberation.
As a fixed AIR sign, Aquarius encourages us to open our minds to options never considered before; so embrace your weirdness, dress up, wear a mask, get your freak on!
Ayn Rand, Louis Carroll, Jules Verne and Alice Cooper all exemplify this energy~
This month Venus is opposite the moon- sitting right next to the Sun, so this “what about me” energy is compounded. Our own ego is demanding our own needs be met and pushing against the energy of the Full Moon; so projecting your own agenda, especially toward passion, will only cause hurt feelings on both sides. It’s a perfect time to have a heart-to-heart with your primary partners to clear the air, and establish parameters that will benefit everyone concerned.
People with Aquarius energies probably call everyone nicknames like buddy and sweetie… their convivial social energy is platonic, playful and goofy and decidedly NOT romantic.
So it’s best to take objective steps back and disengage from emotionality, to see where you’ve been over-reacting and over-reaching regarding love and affection in your closest relationships…..
Even if you feel you’ll DIE without that special someone’s attentions, or receive a specific outcome on an important situation you’re involved in – practice Non-Attachment now – LET GO of your expectations, forget past wrongs, and learn to take yourself lightly.
What’s needed most when we are so ‘hooked into’ outcomes is to Visualize the Positive outcome you wish to see in your life and hold onto that energy. Release any anxiety or negativity, otherwise, by the Law of Attraction, the negative will be drawn to you.
Learn to accept only the good! 
That bears repeating, Learn to accept only the good!
Live – Love – Laugh … it will heal all matter of things.
I have been deeply drawn to think about how to get my social groups more organized; to consider and validate everyone’s comfort zone in participating in cooperative ventures…especially social networking and developing deeper connections via salons and study groups, so I’m going to take the week to Re-search and investigate the technology behind this idea, while Mercury is still retrograde.
What would the perfect world look like if YOU could create it?
With Pluto in Capricorn, the power is already moving toward destruction of old patriarchal systems; government overthrow and reformation of society, financial restructuring and possible a barter economy.
What skills do you have that could be bartered?
What would your part be in creating a more perfect union or harmony in your life?

Any and all wild ideas are welcome and ready to be heard at this point in time. Think outside the box – Lighten up – Open up and let the sunshine in~

“Full Moon in Aquarius: The former Rebel finds people of like mind and becomes center of an affinity group; declares that all of humanity ought to be friends as well.” – Raven Kaldera

originally posted August 13, 2011

Posted August 19th, 2012.

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Saloon Salons; or The Art of Conversation is Not Dead

This fall, my husband and I are going to start facilitating ‘Salons’ in our home, where we facilitate dialogue on lots of metaphysical topics. We’re inviting a few couples now to come and spend two evenings a month socializing in a new way~

Instead of talking about sports, or [God-forbid] work! we’re going to offer up topics to consider ahead of time by email, so that our friends can have some time to ponder the subject and have formulate some thoughts before coming over. Of course, these will be opening questions and convos will go off topic and allow for a wide-ranging, involved discussions that may lead to who-knows-what? Flash mobs and social activism, creation of music and art, and probably a more dynamic community. Watch out world!

Topics we’re considering combine the latest Scientific findings and esoteric Spirituality; ‘the nature of the universe, unified field theory, string theory’, practical applied Kabbalah principals, personality types of the Enneagram, and more general topics such as ‘what is the definition of the Authentic self?
These kinds of ‘adult education classes’ are the kind I teach/participate in at our Unitarian Universalist church, but we hope to start more meaningful dialogue and a comfortable, close-knit group of friends by opening up our home. Of course, alcoholic beverages will be served up to loosen the otherwise tight lipped. We’ll call them “Saloon Salons” 😀

I hope to get permission from the participants to post general comments here about our findings.
I encourage you to try this in your homes as well! Why settle for small talk when there’s so much depth to life?  ~ooohhH! this will be exciting! Stay tuned.

Comment: our first ‘official’ Saloon Salon was held September 10, 2011  on the topic of “The Nature of Reality; parallel universes and cosmic consciousness. A good time was had by all.
Upcoming Salon to be held October 22, 2011 on the topic “How does the Mind affect Reality” using the book, “Biology of Belief” and the latest findings on Matter and Mass. Stay tuned…

originally published August 2, 2011

Posted August 19th, 2012.

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Building Trust

Trust is important in any relationship. Especially those we want to maintain.
We may say “I trust you…” but what does it mean and how can we become people worthy of others’ trust?

Here are a few points I discovered along my long and winding road;
1. Familiarity and contact is first and foremost. We trust people who show up. Who are dependable and do what they say they will do. Out of sight, out of mind…Creating quality ‘FaceTime’ is paramount to developing trust between people. Knowing we will see someone at a regular time and place creates an aura of comfort in which we can attempt to invest our valuable time with others.
2. Resemblance– we tend to trust people who hold similar world views as ourselves, although having an ‘agreement to disagree’ also holds. The point being that honesty abides and ground rules have been established.
Allowing others to reveal their true selves is important to developing trust. On the other hand,  
3. Flexibility and Tolerance are key to Spiritual growth, as well as reaching outside ones typical circles of engagement. Making new friends in order to grow your circle of relationships takes courage and keeping the old takes commitment. Seeing with the heart and allowing for personal differences will allow others to trust you.
3. Consistency– especially in new relationships, and those with children, consistency is paramount to developing a trusting relationship. Actions speak louder than words, or apologies. Don’t promise what you cannot fulfill but try to give of yourself and your time to invest in the relationship. Don’t expect relationships to continue, grow or flourish without regular watering and feeding.
4. Dedication– knowing that another person will conscientiously stick to the details of their promises helps us learn that they are reliable and will be able to be counted on in the future. Punctuality counts for a lot while interacting with others and shows our respect. A timely response prior to a cancellation is always better than becoming a ‘no-show’. Learning that another has a sense of personal responsibility and integrity are important aspects to knowing that someone can be trusted.
5. Transparency– knowing that both parties are honorable and above board with their actions toward one another creates a safe atmosphere in which trust can develop.
6. Self-disclosure– sharing personal details may be more difficult for some of us than others. This sets up the possibility of feeling vulnerable, but that openness also creates a feeling of growing potential trust. Giving ‘tit’ for ‘tat’ creates a feeling of balance, where we know our input has been well met and reciprocated. (one of my friends calls this ‘social debt’)
7. Engagementreciprocity of conversation on many subjects creates a feeling of balance and equity between people. The more time spent in interpersonal interaction the greater the amount of trust is freely shared.

#Trust the Universe to provide your needs and the energies sent out will return to you!!
#Trust people first, let them prove you wrong.
#Be slow to judge and slower yet to condemn.

Learning to walk a mile in another’s shoes will provide you with a new perspective in which to develop trust and understanding on an individual basis.
~and by posting this I am trusting my authentic self who wants to express itself, heedless of the timing or in the way it may be interpreted.

originally published July 25, 2011

Posted August 19th, 2012.

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(with apologies for such ‘ltwt fluff’ to my friend, Raeanne) lol
I recently read a book by Dr. Jan Yager, who spoke of the fact that relationships are always in flux.
(I said f-l-u-x, flux). She called this book, “Friendshifts”.
People’s emotions change day to day and their priorities change over time, so it’s not surprising that the interplay between people fluctuates.

Sometimes a long-time friend will move away – leaving us grieving. What we need to do is be more aware of the present and appreciate the time we share with each other. We need to know that shared time is sacred and realize thatit won’t be exactly the same tomorrow! Then, we have to learn to be okay with that.

Sometimes a good friend will get married or have a child, and the relationship changes due to their obligations. It feels like abandonment, but that’s a selfish point of view. You gotta bless them on their journey and allow them to go their way. Dr. Yager advises us to call them to keep in touch if we can, but even if you don’t stay in touch, you can tell them how much you’ve appreciated their friendship, if you notice it’s lapsed. This is when you have to be flexible enough to let them go.
If they decide they still want to make time for you in their life, cherish them with open arms and a grateful heart.

Sometimes a friend will get a different job or have a different schedule and just won’t have the time for you they used to. We shouldn’t feel neglected, but learn to adjust to their ‘friendship style’ and make ‘dates’ to see them on a regular basis; because when friendships are not fed, they starve to death.

Sometimes things just change between two people, and neither meaning to, fall away from your inner circle of friendship. I think it’s best to address this honestly. It gives each person a sense of redirection or closure. Knowing where you stand with a friend is important. Both people can move back into their own sense of self easier knowing the parameters of their relationship.

Life happens. Feelings may change. People leave us. Sometimes they ‘outgrow’ us or we them. We have to be strong enough inwardly to not let it shake our world when others forsake or forget us.
Which is easier said than done! When it comes down to it, we die alone, and need to be okay with our own company first, before we look to others.
I’ve told my kids that they have to be able to live on their own before they even consider living with someone else. They know how to cook, clean and do laundry, pay bills and be self sufficient. It’s only when they are complete in themselves that they’ll have a chance at healthy relationships and know if it serves their highest good.

I realized just last winter when I was discussing ‘Friendship’ with a small group at church, that I still have strong attachments to people I knew a long time ago and may never see again!
Others told of how they had let friendships slide or broken them off altogether. They were perfectly fine with forgetting people and moving on. I was stunned! I’ve only broken up with a friend or companion a rare couple of times. Even old boyfriends have their ‘guest room’ in my heart.  As long as they weren’t abusive, I’ve maintained connections in most of my previous relationships. I suppose I am the most ‘loyal’, or sentimental, friend I know!

Others know better than me how to ‘disengage’ their connections this way. They say it drains personal energy to leave these attachments open. I tend to keep the link open, just a bit, in hope that the connection might be re-established. I find that there is nothing sweeter than reconnecting with old friends, even if it’s been years. It won’t be exactly the same, but it’s usually satisfying when we can hold and honor the memory of an old friendship.

Mastin Kipp of The Daily Love blog says something that’s important to keep in mind as well~
“From the beginning of any relationships I start, that I want to acknowledge my own imperfection as well as the imperfection of the other person and consciously choose to enter into a relationship not seeking perfection, but rather loving each others imperfections. And instead of looking to the other person to meet all our needs perfectly, to take our eyes off of ourselves and put them on The Universe.” [Trust the flow of life in our higher selves]
I thought that was a nice sentiment, because projecting “perfection” onto people is not only unfair, it’s impossible to measure up to. We need to give each other the benefit of the doubt, lots of ‘wiggle room’ and keep a sense of humor with our friends. It’s the only way to make things last~ even if they do shift.
Namaste and may your friendships be healthy, strong and long lasting originally published July 23, 2011

Posted August 19th, 2012.

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